The things I wish I bought in the aisles of Target but didn’t or else I’d be broke, volume 14.

   Guys! It’s been nearly a freaking year since I last did one of these! What the hell! How am I ever going to get a Target sponsorship with that lack of commitment! Let us go forth! 

Parker stayed home from school this day. But wait. Before you go thinking I had my feverish or vomiting kid at Target spreading his nasty germs all over the shopping cart, Legos, and spooky Halloween decorations, I say nay. He wasn’t actually sick. He just was feeling off that morning (he has a sensitive stomach; we’re still trying to work it out.) and ever the softie, I let him stay home. It was actually lovely because I have the sweetest memories of cruising Target with the both of them, and get genuinely a little bummy when we’re missing our Parker. Okay, now let us go forth. To the Dollar Spot.Enamel mugs! I can’t find them online to link to them, but they were in the dollar spot, and they cuuuute. However, maybe it’s best that I not link to them because, ya’ll, am I the only person who wonders if that paint in all its non-glazed beauty is safe to drink hot beverages out of? Just me? I did find this mug though and I am into it.Velvet… “velvet”… mini pumpkins. Wouldn’t a bunch of these in a wooden bowl in the center of your table be really cute? Yes they would. This women’s fleece jacket. So cozy. You won’t take it off.More fleece jackets. Hello. Burnt orange, you’re mine. Gonna zip you right up over the previously mentioned one and be warm and not give a damn.I don’t totally get this collaboration but, if you do, and want a bag with the ‘ol Hunter label slapped on, look no further.I know we keep saying it but for real does this not look so much like Madewell for Target? I like the print, I don’t love the ruffle. Those are very me colors. Also, mock turtlenecks are decidedly back in but remember when they were so very out? This goes to show you, it’s not wise to pitch everything that doesn’t spark joy. Because next season, it will.   I like whatever is going on here. Overalls on the right here. Jumpsuit on the left here.

And these dresses! Those colors, that wrap (I love a good wrap dress). A little late in the season for them now, but the price is right

      Is this just me with sweatshirts (I’m thinking no)–every time I see one, I give it serious pause: I need this sweatshirt. Do I need this sweatshirt? I think I need this sweatshirt. I really need this sweatshirt. It’s sooo different from any other sweatshirt I have. What can I say… I just love a sweatshirt. There’s no end to the sweatshirts I think I need (promise that’s the last time I will say sweatshirt in this paragraph). And if the variables are just slightly different, well, it’s even harder to talk myself out of. (Good news! I talked myself out of this one. But I had already made up like three different outfits including it in my head first.)Blanket scarves!!! I felt them. Not itchy.    Another fleecy wonder that I’m going to triple up with the first two! I’ll be like the boy in Christmas Story who can hardly move but I will be SO WARM! I can’t find this to link to it, but I did find this and love those colors!I thought these were some decent knock-offs are otherwise very expensive men’s shoes. The ones on the right look similar to Steve’s favorites! And these ones are almost a perfect knock off of a fancier Clarks brand style. (Right?)I just liked them.

  The boys would like me to link to all of the Lego products and also to send you our address in case you want to gift any to them. (Anders’ birthday is coming up. DM me.)Halloween books!True story, Anders used to be totally freaked out by this guy two years ago. Like couldn’t take his eyes off of him, even from two aisles away. This year, he got a little braver and opened a can on him. He said he used the sword on the ghost’s genitals, but he didn’t say the word genitals. I guess it was his way of showing the guy who’s boss. If creepy Halloween is your thing, Target is FULL of fun (creepy) things. Parker really wanted to bring this one home, but I draw the line somewhere. At creepy clocks apparently.You know where I don’t draw the line, however? BASKETS. Target has so many baskets that I’m going to start buying shit just to necessitate baskets to put said shit in. (I don’t have a gun let alone many guns to necessitate an entire rack. Name the movie.)That brass planter stand thing. Real cute. Real, real cute.

What, Target? What are you trying to pull? Just take my wallet. Here’s my bank account number too. And my 401k.

This next section is dedicated to Kristen Ess products because every time I go to Target I spend too much time reading the front and back of each of these bottles, conjuring up all the ways I REALLY NEED WHATEVER IT IS IN MY HAND, and removing the caps to smell them. Like a blow dry mist… I’ve somehow made it 34 years without one but now cannot go a day longer if it’s not mine. A scalp scrub? That’s exactly what my scalp has been needing! Recovery balm and bun cap?! But of course! (Please tell me, what do you love by her? I used this last week after toying with it for like 3 months (non-committal) and I will say, I’m a fan.) Clean nail polishes by Tenoverten. Also, grrrrreat colors. Cute kids project, I think.Best cards selection always. Punch today in the face!I love a fine tipped Pilot G-2 and in all those colors?! Get in my cart.More pretty cards.

And that is all. Once agaaaaain, Target (this is getting redundant; I see you, playing hard to get): email me at itsahuntlife@gmail.com to get the ball rolling on our collaboration.