It’s hardly believable that I’m writing this post about this graduate. Our William is 18, graduating high school, and in the fall heading off to college (though, not too far!). Is there anything new to say about time? Or time from a mother’s perspective, anyway? I remember him getting on the bus for the first time, having been homeschooled for most of his life, and the nerves, oh the nerves! He was timid and lacked total confidence but was one of the most empathetic, kind young boys. He went off to 4th grade, tail between his legs but trying to put on a brave face and I was so worried about how it would go, and so anxious for him to come home. Mind you, this was the first time since I’d married Steve a few years earlier that he’d ever gone to school. Though these feelings are par for the course for a Mom to feel, I think step mothers can have a tricky relationship with their feelings. So much desiring to feel, love, and care like Mom, through and through, but wondering how natural it will all come. Will I be accepted? Will the role become me? Will the feelings follow? Will I be good at this?!? So when you’re confronted with this sort of angst until your child is back safely in your nest, you’re happy, really. Because you’re like a real Mom. You’re worrying just like they do. You’re loving just like they do. Of course, William has never really felt much like my stepson anyway. He embraced me from the start. Needed me in a way that always felt natural, validating, easy.
And now that little boy is 18 years old, a few inches taller than I am, and driving all around town, working a job, and coming and going with friends all the time. Hard to believe I won’t be yelling at him to get out of the bathroom when I’m trying to get ready for bed, or seeing him make himself a peanut butter and jelly (every. single. morning.), or having him tell jokes that sometimes fall flat but then we laugh at the failed attempt anyway. He’s been the right hand man for so many things around the house from moving mulch to getting Anders’ shoes on as we’re rushing out the door, able to predict in a way well beyond his years where help is needed, and quick to jump in to give it. There are a lot of things to say about William, but maybe my favorite is this: he’s always been really easy to love. It’s true, William. Love you so much.
Congratulations to William and your family. Happy celebrations! 🙂
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
That just made me cry. Congrats to the both of you!
So wait, you married Steve and homeschooled the kids as a kid fresh out of college? Wow. Congrats to William and all the best as he leaves the nest. It’s a bittersweet time for sure and I know your little boys will miss him terribly. I think I came across your blog when you made Lindsey that rainbow cake…you’ve been acing this mom thing for a long time so give yourself a big pat on the back. They’re all so fortunate to have you in their lives.
no, steve hired a family friend with an education background to tutor them before we were married. i think it’s been mentioned here but not for quite some time. but no, i was still finishing my degree and not ready to take on homeschooling at the time.
thank you cynthia!
Hi Bridget! I started to follow your blog when my daughter was a baby (8 years ago) mostly because i felt curious and drawn to the fact that someone can give her whole self to the task of being the mother of someone else’s kids. Watching you grow and learn with them all these years its been amazing…so much LOVE. You are a wonderfull Mon.
I meant wonderful mom! Sorry
that’s amazing–8 years! thanks for reading all this time, and for your kind comment. xo.
This is beautifully written. Congratulations to William! And Congratulations to you, mom, for making it through!
This made me cry and I’m not even sure why. Maybe because of your vulnerability- your honesty about wanting to do well and right by these kids, your fear that you wouldn’t measure up somehow, and how William’s love and need for you affirmed you. What a gift to Steve. What a gift to William’s birth mom. How incredible to be able to reflect and see how much you’ve grown alongside your kids. Thanks for sharing this Bridget.
PS: And what a handsome kid! Sheesh, how did that happen? Wasn’t he just about Parker’s size two minutes ago?
Thanks so much, Kimberly. I’ve made many a misstep in 11 years together, but kids are forgiving! And yes… he literally was Parker’s size 2 minutes ago!
I met William when he was two weeks old, snuggled up on Shannon’s chest. You have done a beautiful job of mothering him. I can only imagine how thankful she must be. ❤️
oh courtney, that image brought tears to my eyes. thanks you. i hope to meet you one day.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️