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Call it end of the year analysis, or maybe it’s the fact that I just had a birthday, but I’m wanting to, more all the time, figure out how to be better. Is this just what getting older is all about? Anyway, here is a small list of some things that I want to implement starting today:
When I see someone, even a stranger, and think of a compliment about them, give it. Don’t just say it in my head. Say it out loud, always.
Be better at self care. Even if that just means going to bed half hour earlier, meditating for 10 minutes every morning, using a nice lotion on my legs when I get out of the shower, or going to a movie by myself every other month. Decide what it is and do it.
Speaking of meditation, learn to meditate, dammit. I am getting closer all the time, I know. But my head is never, ever really quiet. Ever.
Come up with a service project that can include all the kids (so many places can’t, and I’d love to do one as a family that involves something very hands-on). Any ideas?
Go outside every day this winter (besides to just run to the car). This will probably be the hardest one for me to achieve.
Practice gratitude every day. Get the kids in on it. (We’ve actually started a little bit of this before dinner and I’m enjoying it.)
Keep my phone upstairs, away from me. Sometimes I find myself logging into IG with a feeling of dread. Dread at the addiction of it and the way it sometimes makes me feel. And yet… I keep clicking my way through. (To be fair, sometimes I really do love it. Just not as much as I’m doing it.)
Read this book and really implement its wisdom. Freeing myself from habitual thoughts and realizing that I am not my thoughts is something I would really, really like.
Be a better consumer. This is on my mind constantly.
Keep on top of the laundry. I’m really just a happier person in a neat home, and this is one of the things I let go.
Have completely uninterrupted time where my attention is all on my kids. The computer is not nearby, the phone isn’t distracting me, but it’s all about them. And I let them lead.
What are the things you keep thinking that you want to do but just haven’t yet?
I love giving compliments! This is something I’ve been practicing for quite some time and it does just as much for me as it does for whomever (whoever?!) I’m complimenting! The smile or surprise and thanks when you catch someone off guard…more awesome! I’ve also been working on receiving compliments with a sincere ‘thank you’ instead of a backstory on whatever it is! (Less easy!)
I am almost crying reading this post and your comment Sarah because I am so living that vicious cycle right now and have been for some time…. it does make me feel a little better that I am not alone in this. Bridget, getting the phone out of view for me has already made a big difference! Whether I get more done around the house or get to actually play with my kids instead of watching them play while I am on my phone has done wonders. Plan to keep it a goal go forward. Also Mike just texted me today as I am in the midst of a head cold that wont go away saying I need to work on going to bed earlier, so add that to my list too. Instead of feeling like I “need” to sit down and watch that Netflix series, what I REALLY need is more sleep so that is a switch I am looking to make starting today. Also, your everyday outside in the winter goal?! I admire you for that one Bridget I truly do, I just go straight to hibernating lol
Yes yes yes yes! But why are these goals so crucially important to me at midnight or before the kids wake when I can reflect, but during the day it all gets muddled? Prioritizing ME?!…backburner. Something to distract from the chaos?!….social media. Then night falls and i regret my choices. It’s an ugly cycle.
I strive to be more intentional about everything. To sort through and organize my 80,000 photos. I say ‘come on, Sarah-just work on photos for an hour a day!’. I want to journal. Finish baby books! Take meals to elderly and sick people from church. The list is endless 🙂
I literally could have written this comment, word for word. You are not alone.
Sarah, I so relate to your comment. SAME. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you! We are all in the SAME BOAT!
Sarah, I 100% relate. Your comment is like taking a walk inside my own thoughts.
Brooke, let’s be friends! Want to come drink coffee and eat brownies on my couch??
I love your goals. I’ll be taking some of yours for myself, like practising gratitude every day. 🙂
PS. I really like your outfit!
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
gosh, this is all me, too!!!! i want to be better. at everything. and then i just get so overwhelmed by goals that i flip flop and all i want is to worry less about the pressure of all the goals! what is the balance?! how do you achieve all the goals AND sleep? please let me know when you find out!!! 🙂 🙂 😉 and amen to going outside every day in the winter. even if you freeze, you’re better for it!!!
I can relate to so many of these!
A wonderful family service project is visiting nursing homes and bringing cheer to the residents. My mom worked in several nursing homes when I was a kid and I would often volunteer. Just having young faces around brings so much joy to the residents. You can call ahead and ask to speak to their activities director and see if they have projects you can be a part of– they often have music, art, exercise, etc.
One thing we’ve found that allows total family involvement is visiting a nursing home or assisted living facility. You can go at meal time and visit people, take craft projects and pass them out, just HANG. One facility near us has a “Cookies and Milk” event on a Saturday morning once a quarter, and we just go and play. Bring bubbles. The old folks are so happy just being around kids.
This is such a wonderful list and makes me smile just reading it. The first really hit home – complimenting a stranger. I was on the metro on a late night in DC and I saw this tall, gorgeous black woman with a perfectly form-fitted red dress and the most beautiful, full afro I’d ever seen. She sat across from me and I so badly wanted to compliment her but I was afraid she’d think I was mocking her or just some weirdo. Weeks later and I still wish I told her how beautiful I thought she was.
She sounds beautiful. I’ve had the same reservations about complimenting people before, but it seems like it’s always welcomed (especially women to women). Next time!!!
Such a great post. Going outside every day and keeping your phone upstairs are such great things to be aware of! I think I’ll add them to my list too. 🙂
Every Christmas, ever since I was in 1st grade, my family has gone to a nursing home on Christmas Day. In our younger years we would play whatever instrument we were learning while my Dad and Mom carried the majority of it with the piano and guitar. Now that we’re all older we still go, playing instruments that we played in high school. Its never the best sounding gig – but always the best experience. Some of the best memories I think I’ve ever collected over the years.
I guess I just love that service projects always end up benefiting you maybe even more than who you are serving. Perspective is a beautiful thing.
One more comment! In regards to the nursing home idea – I take both of my kids (18 months and almost 6) to places like this each Friday morning. One is more of a memory care facility with dinentia/Alzheimer’s residents and the other is an independent living facility. Both are wonderful places with awesome employees and residents. My kids LOVE it and so do the residents. Sometimes we do exercises and crafts with them. Sometimes we just sit and talk to them or my daughter makes up a dance routine lol. Not all facilities are dark and sad and have an odor 😉
Also, we have a tradition of taking cards and cookies to a firehouse each year on Christmas Day. I want to make sure my kids understand that it’s not just about all the ‘getting’, but being mindful of those who choose to be away from their families to serve us on that day.
Loving all these goals and ideas.
Bridget, I think Cradles to Crayons, is a great place for families to volunteer. I have a friend who goes with her kids every Good Friday, which I think is a lovely tradition. PS – As an old Mom, just a reminder be kind to yourself, raising little ones it a lot of work. xoxo Julie
Love these goals…especially #1 on your list! It’s something I’ve thought about as well but to see someone put it into words just reinforces it for me. Thank you!!
Other volunteer ideas : making cards for hospital patients, backyard growers in Gloucester, making meals for Family promise or check out United Way volunteer hub. The United way had volunteer ideas for all ages every day.
https://www.handsonportland.org
Do you have this in your area? It is amazing! I have used it to find volunteer experiences for my whole class. Even when I taught first grade…they list the age requirements. One summer I committed myself for 4 volunteer jobs per a week. I signed up for all of them on here… I shopped for seniors or disabled, cleaned out/organized a shed where people drop of donations for refugees, helped fit donated bicycle helmets on economically disadvantage kids, clean up work on school grounds, etc. It was so interesting. It had a huge impact on me!
Hey, Bridget!
I love your goals, and your blog 🙂 I’m 4 months pregnant with my first so I’ve been especially appreciating the many motherhood and birth posts lately, so thank you for telling your story!
That said, I know you’re occasionally in the Philly area and there is this great organization that I’ve done clean-ups with. I don’t think United by Blue exists up on the North Shore, but maybe something comparable does? Otherwise, I’ve definitely seen young kids on these clean ups: https://unitedbyblue.com/blogs/cleanups
Mostly they’re super safe (especially if you’re not telling your kids to dig for trash) and a lot of fun. Maybe some time when you’re here it could be a day trip with the fam?
Anywho, hope you and Steve are well!
Erin
YES! Lately, I’ve found myself apologizing to others (& to myself) for “not being better” yet I’ve realized I do nothing to consciously change, other then note my faults … SO, thank you for putting to paper the thoughts in my, and so many beautiful Womens, minds. I’ve been reading along with you for awhile, but, am just now getting the courage to say hi, ha! Thanks for being YOU!
THIS. yet I’ve realized I do nothing to consciously change, other then note my faults …
YES. You and me both!
Have you read Emily Ley’s tip for laundry? Her mom turned her on to it – go through every day and just do one load. Gather up all the things and throw them all in together. She says she uses color catchers in the wash and just washes everything together and it has revolutionized laundry for her! I have yet to try it since I cannot get past the everything in together idea (even towels with clothes)…
for the the washer/dryer part is not so challenging – it’s the folding/putting away part I have trouble with!!! also, I can’t get on board everything together either! I’m such a stickler for separating, especially the whites!
Wow! Lots of great goals. You’re better than me, I need to focus on just one or two or they never happen.
As far as the service goes, I love what people have said about rest homes. There is also Justserve.org which is a place where people can list their projects or needs by area. We live in kind of a small town, but there are always things listed and many of them are ones I have taken our 4 and 2 year old to. We try to serve all year,but it’s so meaningful at Christmas time. #LightTheWorld !
What a lovely post, you have so many brilliant goals. I love the ideas of complimenting people & getting AWAY from the phone – it is so easy to become obsessed and forget to live in the moment. This is something that I am sure we all need to work on!
Holly from The Art of Being Holly xo