Steve lost his father on Friday. They live pretty far away (in Mexico) but he’d been able to get down there twice last month as his father’s health continued to decline. Besides going down there, he’d been calling at least twice a day for the last several weeks and, when his father’s health prevented him from doing much more than simply listening on the phone, Steve sang hymns to him night after night, hymn after hymn. I’d hear him from the living room in the evenings when I’d come down from putting the boys to bed and it was both heartbreaking and beautiful.
My father-in-law was one of the most tender men. Whenever we were together–admittedly not that often because of how far we lived from each other–he always made a point to so intentionally tell me how grateful he was that I was in Steven’s life. That Steven and the kids had found me after losing Shannon. He’d have tears in his eyes as he said this and be gripping both my upper arms as though his words would carry more weight that way. He gave great hugs. He’d always be the last one to go to bed, playing cards with Jordan, and often the first one up, coffee in hand. He retold a few of the funniest stories and it didn’t matter that you’d already heard them, because hearing him it again would include his laughter which was the best because he had the heartiest laugh. He’d been at his wife’s 16th (!!) birthday party and they were nearly inseparable until his death. A few weeks before he died, he cleared–for the first time ever–the pool table. He was a successful businessman and then, in his retirement, would go off-roading in a souped up Jeep in Colorado, or hunting with his friends. He was so generous. He had the sweetest smile. We’ll miss him a lot.
Steve’s birthday was earlier this month, and I never gave him his own post. It’s a bit strange to here, and a bit late too, but I will take a moment to say something about this wonderful man, which, on second thought, is perhaps fitting in a post about his father who had such influence on him. Watching him over the past several weeks love his father the way he did was really something special. He is full of integrity and tenderness, selflessness and sacrifice, and his love is an action. I’m grateful to be on the receiving end of it.
I’m so sorry for your family’s loss. He sounds like a wonderful man who will be truly missed =/
I’m so sorry for your loss, Steve will be missed!
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
I am so sorry for your family’s loss. Fathers-in-law are very special. Mine passed away last month, and I’ve missed him every day since.
I am so sorry for your family’s loss. I lost one grandmother in August and another just last week, and no matter how expected it may be (my grandmother who passed in August was ill for a long time, and gradually declining for months), or how unexpected (my grandmother who just passed was injured in a fall, and suffered a traumatic brain injury that shocked us all) – it is NEVER easy to bear the loss of a loved one. I empathize and sympathize, and my well wishes are with you and yours. Your words about him made him seem so special and a great loss.
And now I’m crying at work! He sounds like an amazing man, and how lucky for all of you to have had him in your lives. My thoughts and prayers are with each of you during this difficult time.
Oh, I’m so sorry for your loss – my heartfelt sympathy goes out to you and your family.
He sounds like a wonderful man who left a great legacy in his son. May he rest in peace and may his legacy carry on in his children’s children. My sympathies to you and your family.
Most sincerely.
Carol
I am so sorry to your loss. What a beautiful family picture at the end of your post.
I’m sorry for your loss. And I love the way you talk about Steve (and his dad). It is so refreshing to see someone not only not publicly bash her husband, but hold him up in high esteem.
What a beautiful post. So very sorry for the loss of such a great man, I’m sure things will feel different this year as the holidays come around. I’ve had that thought before…what it must be like to wake up for the very first time knowing this is the first day you’ve lived without one of your parents. I watched one of those Super Soul Sundays on the OWN network awhile back as Oprah interviewed Whoopi Goldberg. The one thing I remember about that interview was how she spoke of her mother’s death. She said something to the affect of realizing how now no one else’s eyes will light up quite like her mother’s did when she walks into a room. Steve sounds like a wonderful man and I’m sure plenty of eyes still light up when he walks into a room, but I’m sure none quite like his father’s…not in the same way. Praying for you all before I head to school and pick up those three babies of mine who make my eyes light up.
Steve singing him hymns over the phone at night, so beautiful! He sounds like an Amazing man and he surely raised a good one himself! Hugs and prayers for you all!
I am so sorry for y’alls loss. Losing a loved one, especially a parent, is never ever easy. It is so beautiful though that Steve was able to connect with his father on such a beautiful level, and singing those hymns, be still my heart. <3
Hugs to y'all.
Sending hugs to Steve x
Loss is hard. So sorry your family is going through this right now. It sounds like Steve’s dad was a great man!
What a beautiful post and tribute to Steve’s father.
Losing a parent is the absolute hardest! Dealing with the grief is the 2nd hardest part! Thinking of y’all!
Sincerest sympathy to your husband and all of you. Thank you for sharing these moments. Life is beautiful, even when it is so very hard.
oh my goodness. i am just catching up on a lot of favorite blogs, and i am so so sorry to hear about steve’s father. that is so hard. sending my love!