I felt melancholy today. End of summer stuff, maybe. Cloudy weather. Sometimes the last baby stuff creeps in there too. Oh how I miss my baby. And then it’s compounded with questions of did I enjoy it? did I put my phone down and take him in? And I’ll have those same questions in one year about me now, and on and on it goes. An unending cycle. Social media has felt heavy lately too. I check in and it feels like there’s a lot of really weighty stuff. So then I don’t check in for a bit cause honestly (can I say this in a whisper because I feel like being a blogger and all I’m supposed to like Instagram) I don’t love Instagram. I wish I could say it’s for only really good reasons like wanting to be more present in my day to day life (which is, by and large, the majority of the reason; it is such a time-suck and I virtually never feel like it is a worth it time-suck) but it’s also because of the curation (hate that word) over there, the information overload, and finally the inability to grow unless you’re active active active. Seriously. It’s two steps forward two steps back and such a headache. I just don’t have the patience for the game, and I hate that I should even have to play it. It’s a part of my business, so I need to, but I find the whole thing (post-algorithm, especially) frustrating. And then you’re just inundated with images and info and I click out of it and I don’t even remember what I saw or read or double-tapped. It’s mindless. And sometimes mind-numbing. And yet sometimes it’s the first thing I reach for in the morning. Why?!? This doesn’t mean I’m disappearing over there. These are merely the thoughts that have been running through my head for months now. (Though, there is true heart-sharing over there too, and there are many times that I’ve been really grateful for the space to share and to have others share with me.) But the old days where you’d throw up a picture, slap the Rise filter on it, and write a little caption without giving it much thought? I miss them.
I made French onion soup the other day from Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking. Cloudy and cool and this devastating news coming from Charlottesville, I felt like I needed something cozy brewing in the kitchen. It was beyond decadent. So much that one was certain that it was loaded with butter. Only 2 tablespoons! Those caramelized onions, if you’re patient, will win the day. Slow and steady they become something completely different than when they were first tossed into the pot. It was my first time, though it’s nearly identical to this caramelized leek soup which I made once. To my mind, they taste so alike but leeks are tedious the way they get grit and dirt in between their layers so I’d choose French onion soup over the leeks any day. It’ll be a winter staple, I think. The only downside is that the boys probably won’t touch it. Onion soup? It seems unlikely. Maybe if I shovel in a spoonful when they’re not expecting it, they’ll fall for the flavors after all. It happened to be Julia Child’s birthday yesterday. I didn’t know this at the time but it was a happy coincidence. (It was topped with toasted French bread and a generous grating of melty Swiss cheese before being served too. Key.)
I’m having something of a love affair with bralettes. It’s such a nice break from underwire and they’re so pretty. I bought two before going to Italy and I wore this one in black constantly. I didn’t mind if a little bit was showing (how cheeky) either because that’s how I roll in Italy. It’s so comfortable. It’s the bra I’m grabbing most this summer when I’m getting dressed. Are their any other perfect ones out there I should know about?
Can the same post talk about soup, social media, the state of affairs in the U.S., and bralettes? I guess so.
What’s going on with you guys? What’s on your mind? There’s a lot on mine. Let’s talk.
I’ve never made French onion soup before. I always see it on menus when I go out to eat, but have never ordered it as well. It actually sounds delicious though, despite being, y’know, ONION soup, haha!
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Bridget! I totally agreed with your Instagram assessment in a way- I hate the click, click, click of it all and decided I’m not playing that game…which doesn’t help my business. But what I do actually love is watching the stories- and making them when I have something authentic and fun to show. So if it helps- I really like your stories…it reminds me that here are sweet little kids running around and a good momma there with them and that I can have wine at 3:00. (JUST KIDDING!) Although tedious, I think it helps your followers get to know you and your life a little better, as creepy as that sounds. So if it helps, we’re enjoying it on the flip side. I know– It’s not ALL ABOUT US! Anywhoooo- Have a great day and cheer up! Maybe a more summery meal? That soup is dragging you into winter!
Ha, it’s true. That soup was such a fall/winter choice (but necessary). And thanks for the story-love. And wine at 3:00 is perfectly acceptable.
Sometimes wine at 3 is essential!
I never comment on any blog I read but yours touched a nerve..in a good way. I am scared, repulsed, angry, emotionally numb from everything happening in the world and I feel somewhat unplugged from it as my normal life keeps rolling along and then I feel guilty for rolling along while others deal with the crazy that happens in our world. Soup is always my default when life is crazy…chili too with all the stuff on top like oyster crackers, shredded cheddar and green onions, This has been a long summer and I’m ready for cozy and blankets and fall weather. My baby is 21 and I still have “baby fever” and second guess decisions I made back when my children were young. I wish I had read to them more, rushed them along less and been more in the moment instead of worrying about the next moment, Oh, and I hate instagram but love it too, I can’t start on looking at it though,,,,total time waster.
I am feeling the same way about instagram! I recently deleted the app from my phone to take a break…..it probably won’t be permanent. It is so heavy. It isn’t about seeing friends/bloggers kids and happenings anymore. I was having a ton of brands and products pushed on me and it felt awful. That soup sounds delicious! Glad to know I’m not the only one disliking the gram.
I just made french onion soup this week, but guess what?! I made the onions in the slow cooker. 12 hours, with 2 T butter and some olive oil and they came out carmelized and delish! I put them on at 9, went to bed and at 9 the next day they were decadent! It was the crock pot recipe from The Kitchen. Look it up. OMG, game changer!
I’m having a hard time finding it.A millionrecipes on The Kitchen site:) Can you point me in the right direction?
The heartbreak over the last baby is real! My last is three now, and was only my last because my body betrayed me. It makes me feel like my heart is literally shattering into pieces. I’m told that one day it won’t hurt as much.. I’m not convinced.
That soup sounds delightful. My husband and I (and our three girls) have been living with my parents for the past couple of months. We move into our own place this weekend and I am dying to cook up some delicious soups!! I may have to add this one to our menu!
We’re sorry to hear you’ve been feeling down and we hope you feel better soon!
French onion soup is one of our favourites!
Sochal – The Healthy Social Network
I enjoy your instastories tho! Long-time reader, and insta-follower. I can relate with the “last baby” thoughts… I also married an “older man” so I have two teen steppers and we have a just turned one year old. We both agree we are one and done (or 3 and done) but I get these thoughts of how I didn’t enjoy the baby phase enough, the newborn phase and all that. Nobody tells you having a baby is insane and hard and I feel this regret that I forgot to really enjoy the little moments. But you can’t go back and now my baby is one… he runs everywhere and is hilarious and learned his first animal sound (cow goes mmmm… everything else goes grrrrr) and its the best but time keeps ya know… slippin slippin slippin…into the future! oy! All that to say I love peeking into your world via the blog and also insta-stories. <3
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, Bridget. I totally agree with you about Instagram. It seems that in order to maintain and increase your followers, you have to constantly produce curated content. It’s exhausting. I don’t post often and, when I do, I try to keep it simple and real. I may have fewer followers than others but that’s fine by me.
I dislike what’s happening over on instagram and felt the need for a break on social media! Started Monday and I feel so much more at peace, reading more, getting crap done on my to do list. Also not worrying about comparing myself. It’s only been 3 days. Hahah. I didn’t erase my accounts or anything. Just happy for a little fast to reset my habits!
I should add that my social media fast does not include blogger checks. Pretty sure I’m the only person who still checks blogger ?
I recently stopped following a lot of bloggers on Instagram. It’s not that I don’t like them as people, anymore, but it has just because so staged, I think, and I don’t need that in my life. Same with celebrities. It’s fun to see what they’re up to, but at the same time it just becomes consuming. So now, I only follow a few bloggers (Bridget included!) and my feed feels more personal because it’s mostly family and friends, with the occasional “stranger” thrown in there.
Oh, hey…I have a love/hate relationship with insta, too. One thing I’m awful at is feeling the need to COMPLETELY scroll through. Why, of all things, does it nag at me if I scroll through for a second and then simply close the app? I do this with FB and Twitter and…it is so lame. I call this “completion” behavior and it’s totally something I need to work on. In the meantime, I’d better keep my insta follow list as short as possible.
TJ Max often has bralettes that strike the perfect balance of pretty, lacy, soft and SO AFFORDABLE. I got my favorite one from there for less than $10. (It was honestly like $6.99 or something.) They’re basically all I wear now…and after several years of pregnancy-nursing-weaning-pregnancy-again I need multiple sizes on hand.
I’m not feeling soup with all this hot weather, but I support your great Julia Childs impression.
I’ve been thinking about the perfect minimal french wadrobe (speaking of bralettes), running training plans, and when to lean into career versus when to lean into family – and how many ways you can lean
Bridget, I so feel you on all this. I pretty much took all summer away from blogging and Instagram world and it was so needed. Things are heavy all over (even outside the internet world). It’s so hard and you’re not alone. As for the baby thing, I don’t quite feel you … yet… but I will. Our last is due in January. It is hard already thinking about it. Thank you as always for being honest in such a beautiful and real way. On a positive note, oh my goodness yum!! French Onion is my absolute favorite soup but I only ever get it when I’m out because making it seemed entirely too daunting! Once again you saved my day (and my entire Fall season ha!)
Bridget, you consciously know you will be alone in the winter of your life so your desire for more babies is sound. You are wanting to ensure that there will be sons, maybe a daughter, and plenty of grandchildren to love and support you. Yes, children are expensive but it seems you have a free college deal. Why not have one more if it brings you peace?
oh amen to so much of this!! the end of summer melancholy hit me so hard as i’m sending my first baby to pre-k. here’s hoping my 2nd baby isn’t turning out to be my last, because i always think about the things you mentioned!! am i soaking it up enough?! would i see things slightly differently if i kneeew he was my last?! i always appreciate your thoughts on motherhood!! and re: instagram… hoooly cow yes. i have felt this so much lately, but especially with the algorithm obsession/pressure… it’s miserable. and when i’m not up for it i find myself sharing less and then i become less relevant so like you said… two steps back. and really, i just want to enjoy my blog most of all… but they say blog traffic comes so much from IG now?! so if i’m not connecting on IG i guess i’m not connecting anywhere and then…. whew!!! i hope enough people grow weary of the “game” because i am hearing more and more mentions of this stuff growing old and iiii agree. maybe it can change one day! and rise filter, those were the days!
And can i add that i love your blog is still a blog not only one big advertisement of sell sell sell…you still write of everyday simple happenings in being a mom and for me thats why i fell in love w blogs initally
Crystal, thank you so much!
I completely agree with Crystal! I’ve stopped checking so many blogs that I used to love because they are just advertising new products every. single. day. and it’s too much! I don’t want to breed a heart and a home that constantly feels the need to buy new things.
I hear you, Samantha. I’m sure I’m sometimes guilty of it too. It’s a balance for sure, figuring out the way to make money as a blogger and not have it be all ads all the time. (I often miss the old days!)
Lady! Ugh! I totally know what you mean about instagram. I feel like everyone is slowly (quickly?) flipping over into these perfectly curated lives that happen to occur in the same color palates with the same theme. Wtf? Thanks for always speaking openly about it because I found your blog while I had shingles last winter (yup 32 and shingles ?) and have been enjoying it ever since due to your continual real thoughts.
lol YES. so many where i’m like “how is your whole life in these beautiful squares of white/gray?” it is v v confusing. also, shingles! no!
French onion soup is one of our favourites! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, Bridget. I totally agree with you about Instagram.