Tales of Me and the Husband

Raising boys.

The presence of boys is evident in this household.  There are guns, there are swords, dreams of Air Soft wars to take place this summer, smelly feet, and talk of armpit hair coming in.  There are bears that meet me every morning when I come down to sit at the desk and check my email.  And wars!  Full blown sieges, really.  If I wanted to pick up that book and read it alongside my coffee, forget about it.  There’s a battle, and everything else, including reading, is secondary to the fight at hand.  
Last night there was wrestling.  Steve against William.  And William, you have to understand, gets high off of rough physical contact.  I mean, nothing will stop him short of Steve sending him to his room.  It’s both hilarious and a little scary.  It started with a fort, pillows everywhere, and blankets too.  And ended with Steve yelling, “If you break my rib again…!!”  Last time, a flailing limb of William’s, we suspect it was a knee, got Steve in the chest and he’s pretty sure it took out a rib.  I enjoy watching it all unfold, from the comfort of a cushy chair.  I keep my fingers crossed that it concludes without a black eye or bloody nose.
Last night I let Parker choose his bedtime book and it was all about knights.  I know more about jousting and squires then I ever thought I would.  And his construction book?  He tests me every time I read it.  Pointing to the vehicle on each page until I guess correctly.  Just to have fun I say, “Cat!  Dog! Blueberry!  Banana!”  He yells an emphatic No each time, huge grin on his face, until I guess it correctly.  It’s always fun when it gets going really fast, causing him to initially yell no at the correct one until it hits him, “Oh wait, that time she did say cement mixer that time!”
When I first married Steve, boys were everywhere and I was ill-equipped.  Having only sisters (and mostly girl cousins, too!), I was lost in a sea of sweaty socks and testosterone.  I understand them better now.  Time and experience are a beautiful pair.  There’s something really nice about being the mother of boys.

Spring’s coming.

Well, it’s happening.  It seemed hopeless at times.  Like Mother Nature might actually skip right over the spring… perhaps hop right over the summer too, and plop us into next winter.  To fight back, we’d claw at the frozen ground, shake our fists at the sky, and then bury our faces in the snow.  But to no avail.  She does what she wants.  The sooner we learn to accept this, relinquish any say, the better off we’d be. I wasn’t good at that from about February 15th and on.  Just made it harder on myself, letting the cold weather get the best of me and my mood.  To hell with you, Winter!  I’m ready to greet you, Spring.  And Summer, I hope you’ll quickly follow.  
I looked at my forecast and for the first time there wasn’t a day in the 20s.  Granting, there was a day that was 30 as the high.  And that morning was definitely dipping into the 20s but, change is a-coming.  This eternal winter, endless tundra, forever Narnia we’ve had is almost through.  Snow is actually melting, the puddles are indicative that it must be happening despite the fact that it’s still all around.  Shoved up against the curbs, trying its best to cling to a little real estate before it disappears forever (for a long while anyway).  It’s hardly white, there’s nothing magical about it anymore, but it remains until it doesn’t.  We’ll play in its puddles while we have the chance.  Rain boots are really a good investment.

a happy list.

a happy list:
// setting a table and serving dinner to my mom and dad; something so full circle and lovely about it
// talking to nathaniel about shows he and i are both watching that steve thinks are stupid (walking dead); and i do get what steve’s saying and judge myself a little every time a zombie comes on but have gotten myself semi-hooked so…
// michael jackson.  i’ve been listening to him a lot lately?
// apple izzes
// having more sunlight through the day.  it’s like we’re all coming out of hibernation (but are supposed to get some snow on wednesday???).
// having a girls’ lunch with lindsey on sunday.  it was just the two of us which is soooo rare.
// how parker and lindsey got in a little spat this week (parker’s fault, i’m quite certain) and separated from each other, then a full thirty minutes later, parker turned to her and said sorry.  like, it was still on his mind and he wanted to apologize.  it was so sweet.
// clean sheets and a bed that’s made
// concert tickets and summer plans
// old-fashioneds; i discovered, thanks to my friend laura, i sort of like bourbon?
// this sweet, somewhat melancholy video i took (but i missed the best moment–william totally slipping and falling on his butt right in the middle of the huge puddle!!) 
// chocolate haagen dazs ice cream
// gifts of oranges and chocolates from the sweetest reader from california to brighten our dreary never ending winter (thank you kat!!)
// good girl friends and diner lunches
// tangled.  i tweeted this, but in case you’re not on twitter… i just think it beats frozen and i apologize to those who i’ve offended.  we watched it on friday night–first time since parker’s been born i think?–and i had forgotten how good it is.
// my family.  oh how i love them.

on blogging and authenticity.

a photo booth strip in which… we were not ready.
a few weeks ago, i posted a photo to instagram asking, in so many words, what people looked for in blogs.

the general consensus was authenticity.

i understand that.  because i look for that too.
but even so, it’s hard.  it doesn’t feel entirely safe to be authentic.  cause, this isn’t really a reciprocal relationship.  the blogger-reader relationship is a funny one in which you guys know me so much better than i know you.  and, it’s all done amidst this weird space called the internet where tone and eye contact and gestures and laughter and tears–all things that build trust and encourage authenticity–are entirely absent.  in life, i’m a fairly non confrontational person, emotional, and i don’t have a very thick skin.  and with those close to me, i’m pretty much an open book.  but putting myself out there via blog?  daunting.  even though, time and time again, i’m reminded that by far the majority of you out there are good and kind and gracious.  i’ve made real and true friends here, i’ve had emails that have brought me to tears.  i have so many memories in words and pictures stored here whose details would otherwise be fuzzy.  and the posts that i’ve revealed the most are some of my very favorite and that’s in large part due to the response from you all.

and yet!  sharing is hard.  i’m regularly frustrated by how much i have to say and how little i actually do say.  i’m regularly frustrated by some of the meanness i see on the internet.  i’m regularly frustrated that i allow it to intimidate me.  by how little slack we cut each other, by the assumptions that are made.  i’m regularly frustrated by people who are so quick to be offended, and people who are so quick to offend.

on the other hand… i’m regularly impressed by this medium and it’s ability to raise awareness on certain issues.  i’m regularly impressed by the way both friends and strangers rally around someone hurting and how quick their story is passed down the lane and offered up in prayers and love.  i’m regularly impressed by the bravery of many.  by the writing and the pictures.  i’m regularly impressed by the relationships in my life that were born out of this blog.  


and so, here we are.

we carry on.

cooking with help.

there are a lot of great things about living with a toddler.  among them are how dang excited they are when you walk in the room (“maaaamaaa!” arms outstretched like he is truly in shock and utter delight that you’ve presented yourself in the same room), their words or perhaps better referred to as their language.  so many words, so much translating.  and do i want him to say them correctly?  no, not yet.  and don’t get me started at the way their little body’s look from behind while they run.  bouncy, more arm-movement than necessary, and totally delicious.
after parker and i came home from story hour yesterday, he needed a quick snack and then he needed to nap.  up too late, up too early, a nap was definitely necessary.  i had plans to make granola (as he calls “reen-bach!” also known as green box also known as the color of the box of granola when we buy it… which we haven’t in awhile but it’s forever “reen-bach!” and that is ok.) but i knew it’d be something he’d totally dig doing with me.  plus, it’s basically a recipe that calls for dumping.  dump this, dump that, a little stir, and you’re set.  so, i promised him granola-making when he woke up.  he had his snack of black beans and cheese and to bed he went.  he has a memory like a steel-vault and two-ish hours later when he awoke, you can bet “reen-bach” was the first thing on his little agenda.
and so we did.  but not before he proudly toted his yellow stool to his spot at the kitchen counter to begin.  i’m sure i’m totally annoying but i find the toddler personality, actions, movements, speech, etc. completely adorable.  sometimes i sit back in awe while i watch the goings-on, watch the wheels turn.  anyway, i filled, he dumped, he stirred.  a little bit of a mess was made–vigorous stirring, if you will–but that’s a part of the fun.  we made this recipe but with a few subtractions, a few additions.  as it sat on the pan cooling, no one can help but grab a spoon and take a bite.  steve said, “you ought to sell this.”   
i don’t see us making a business out of it, but it’s fun in the meantime.  and delicious too.  in more ways than one.

dark chocolate peanut butter cups and other things to write home about.

// trader joes really delivers in the snack department.  these somehow made it into my cart this week and i’m telling myself that, because it’s dark and not milk chocolate, they’re way better for us.  and while all of those cool foodie/paleo/clean-eating instagram accounts are really great and really respectable, sometimes they just make me crave junk food.  i’m quite sure this is not their intention.
// while we’re on the subject of trader joes, their white bean + pesto hummus is really good.
// this swimsuit.  a one piece!  i can’t tell if it’d be totally awesome on or not at all.  i haven’t done a one piece in awhile but there are some fab-u-lous ones out there.  as for two piece, this one’s pretty near perfect.  i have a pair of high-waisted bottoms from top shop already, and they’re really fun.
// a quick and easy read.  it’s our next book club book and, ever-the-shirker, i had this one finished a full month before our next meeting.  weird.  i’m usually a binge-reader (or not at all) before we meet.  anyway, it’s no steinbeck but it’s entertaining.  any good books in your worlds lately?
// for as many times as i write LOL in a text or email, i don’t actually laugh out loud even 15% of the time.  sorry to my friends who i’ve deceived.  no, it’s not as funny as you thought it was.  but i do actually laugh out loud at some of these posts by grace.  conversations with julia are blog-gold, if you ask me.
// if our eternal tundra ever ceases, i think these shoes would be a good summer addition (in the brown + gold, please).
// i mentioned rompers in my ‘almost 30’ post.  i decided i can and i shall so there.  i like this one.  ooh, i think i actually like this one even more.
// and definitely worth writing home about is this (!!): you guys came through in a huge way when i posted this on instagram forever ago.  toilets still aren’t perfect but dishes!  oh my word!  lemishine (i find it at target!) and cascade complete (must be complete!) dry action pacs and my dishes have never been cleaner.  glasses seriously sparkle.  you have no idea how wonderful this is.  we were all getting real tired of rewashing dirty dishes.
// we’ve had this playlist going recently and it’s really beautiful filtering through the background of just about whatever you’re doing.  it’s my “hearken spring!  come out wherever you are!” music.

that is all for now.  

lately.

lindsey was in a play + it was really good.  as soon as we arrived home, she arranged the flowers in a vase for her room // the simple bathroom at the americano
a bunch of nyc snaps!
boys in red.
saturday morning reading.  we need a bigger sofa // william made everyone puffed pancakes this weekend, it was really sweet.
this is such the quintessential teenager picture, isn’t it?  earbuds, peace sign, backwards hat + hoodie // celebrating my dad’s birthday
is it time to take the baby sign down yet?!  🙁
one more nyc picture // catchin’ d’s at a stop
how was everybody’s weekend?  ours was good.  we went out to eat with friends–mexican!–and otherwise relaxed… book reading, puzzle-constructing, pajama-wearing… 
my thoughts are a little distracted this morning.  there are some people close to me who are going through hard things so i’m just thinking about them and as a result i don’t have a lot to say.  except, let’s be kinder, let’s love better.  time is short and all we’ve got is each other.  i’m preaching as much to myself as i am to anyone listening.  
sending my love to you.  hope you have a good week!

a quick jaunt to nyc.

we took a quick trip earlier this week to new york city.  a couple nights, less than 48 hours, and we’re back again.  oh!  and it’s snowing!  (winter talk stops here.)
by the grace of god himself, tuesday was close to 65 degrees and we spent all of it outside, and in the sun as long as a tall building wasn’t blocking it.  
let’s back up.  steve has spring break this week so we decided, initially, to take a two-night romantic trip to nyc.  finally!  the two of us alone!  husband and wife to themselves for more than a few hours?!  what would that even look like?  we couldn’t be sure, it had been so long.  my parents were going to come to both visit and be with the kids while we were gone.  all would be well!  i was a little angsty about leaving parker overnight as this would’ve been the first time i’ve done it but in good hands!  my parents, after all.  parker being ever the astute little fellow, was acting especially clingy and like he wasn’t liking the direction this whole mom-dad-shebang was taking.  i had told him, very casually, a few weeks earlier, about how mame and papa would come and be with him while mama and dada were gone for a little bit.  no problem.  but having it all come to fruition?  he wasn’t as interested.  the night before we left, there i am looking at steve: “we can still do this.  if it goes really badly, we can come back after one night.”  steve: “let’s just bring him.  then we don’t have to worry.  it’ll still be fun.”  bless his heart.
romantic plan foiled.  new york city, still a go.
i was equal parts disappointed and glad.  i wanted to be able to say i did it, parker did it, and all went well.  i really wanted some time off, just being with steve, being somebody’s wife and not a mom for just a little bit.  but it didn’t appear that this would be that time.  i think it all depends on the personality of the little person, and this guy is a homebody type who really likes being with us.  i know it gets easier, i know it’ll happen eventually.  next time.
so, back to new york.  i booked hotel americano through jetsetter (highly recommend booking through jetsetter–it’s sort of a curated list of hotels/deals with various discounts all approved (mostly approved?) by jetsetter editors.  locations vary.).  not the hotel i would’ve booked if i had known parker would be joining but it was a great location, right in chelsea and stone’s throw from the highline.  
first night, we arrived by dinnertime and, after hearing it recommended by many, i wanted to try ippudo.  wait was too long so we went around the corner to the smith.  a happy mistake… my chicken pot pie was delicious (if chicken pot pie is on a menu, ever, it will be what i order.) and steve got this chicken and mashed potato dish that he said was delicious.  despite it being nearly 9 pm by the time we left, parker was keeping it together.  then we went around the block to trader joes for a few snacks for the hotel room (i.e. the third wheel who decided to join us!) and the morning.  a note to the people: trader joes, at 9:30 pm on a monday night, is packed.  line to the door.  it was outrageous.  i told the woman behind me, “you new yorkers are just more resilient than the rest of us.”  she laughed.  we got the necessities: raspberries, two baguettes, cheese, hummus, carrots, cashews, apples.  we took a taxi back to our hotel for the night.
next morning we took a harbor cruise around the city which was really cool.  it had been years since i’ve seen the statue of liberty (except in an, “that speck in the distance is the statue!” way)… i think i was 7 or 8 when i climbed it (back when the crown was more accessible to the public!).  that was really cool, as were the various tidbits the guy with the microphone would yell out as we cruised.  even hollywood tidbits, if that’s your thing (it’s mine…).  
back at pier 78, we walked to lunch at the standard grill and sat outside (another delicious lunch!  order the burger.).  then we ventured back over to the water where we parked ourselves for a few hours on a big turf field right in the sun.  glorious, glorious sunshine.  parker took a short nap and then we walked further downtown, down wall street, and to the brooklyn bridge.  steve read plaques along the way (always reading plaques, that man), we walked through a few churches, took in the new freedom tower, and then began to cross the bridge towards pizza at grimaldi’s.  i’m sure it’s not the best pizza in the city (what is, by the way??) but ever-the-tourists, we were content to play the part, not to mention have a little respite for our weary feet at that point.
the following morning, we had breakfast and coffee at our hotel and took off back to boston.  
next time… it’s just me and you steve.  😉

it felt like spring! so we went to cambridge!









(this is what our attempts at a family picture sometimes look like.  what you see is william pushing lindsey’s arm into the corner of a brick wall because he didn’t want her arm around him.  yay!!!!)
so on saturday it was calling for highs in the upper 40s (!!) and in the sun the temps actually got to mid 50s (!!!!!!!) so naturally we spent all of it outside.  steve had a smidgen-taste (yes.  a smidgen-taste.) of a union square donut from the valentine’s day playdate we had–a semi-stale portion of a man-handled vanilla bean donut hours after the playdate ended but that was all his tastebuds needed to demand “MORE!”  so he’s like, “let’s swing by union square donuts first?”  mmm ok.  i’m not one to argue about a donut.
i got a vanilla bean, probably my favorite.  though the browned butter hazelnut crunch is amazing.  better yet, split them up and taste each one.    
then we went to cambridge because we never do that together and it’s a nice change from our paramount routine.  the harvard campus is a fabulous place to walk, there’s a new shake shack there, and so, that is what we did.  the chairs weren’t out, it was a bit melted-snow-muddy-slush-like but it was 50… 50!  so, you forgive such things.  
while we walked through, steve was wishing that his friend who teaches there was with us so he could point out all the stuff one should know.  you know how you’re walking through a place and you’re positively sure that there is such a wealth of historical (and some present) knowledge that would make the whole thing that much cooler?  and so, i did what any good wife would do, and pulled up a wikipedia of harvard dorms and their notable residents.  “natalie portman lived here.  john updike there.  john f. kennedy here.”  so on and so forth.  in another life, the one where i attend harvard, i’d choose wigglesworth hall if it’s up to me.  while walking through we also gave the kids motivational speeches. they go something like this: “this can all be yours one day!  all of this!  just put your mind to it!”  
and then we had shake shack.  which was delicious.  i can’t decide if it’s a winner over five guys though.  the shack sauce is pretty good, and gives them perhaps the tiniest of leads.  but five guys is really, really good so don’t make me choose.  where shake shack does win is location.  better locations, better ambience.  and the harvard location wins over the chestnut hill one in any case.  locals needing their fix?  go to the harvard one (less ease of parking though, i will give you that.).  and it’s been too long since i last had in-n-out so it’s not even in the running.
that brief burger interlude was absolutely necessary.
while we were eating (outside!  we ate outside!), and virtually any time we were on dry ground, parker would lay down on his stomach, arms outstretched like he needed to be one with the earth.  i swear it, the kid is like, “this is what ground looks like?!?  feels like?!  i’d forgotten!”  we have had a good foot or more of snow on our lawn for months.  months!  he’d forgotten the feel of grass and dirt, so he made sure to get his fill (and bits of ground-debris in his diaper too).  
it was very much what the doctor ordered for us poor, pathetic, stuck-in-an-eternal-winter folk.  

Celebrating mediocrity!

It turns out no matter how many times you listen to Pharrell Williams’ “Happy” it won’t necessarily make you happy.

You didn’t know?

Nevertheless, we listen to that song every single morning, at least five times, along with a healthy dose of the Cars soundtrack (the McQueen and Sally song is really quite wonderful and no matter how many times I listen to it, I will always say to Lindsey, “I really want to go live in Radiator Springs” to which she heartily agrees) with a dash of Wall-E and Finding Nemo.  They’re all just really good soundtracks whether or not you know the movie.  That Thomas Newman really knows what he’s doing.  And while on the subject, so does Randy Newman and did you know they’re cousins?  What a musical family that one is (and they’re not the only two).

So anyway, this whole Bridget’s-such-a-bummer thing is becoming a bit of a trend here and I think I have to break it here and now.  I’m still hanging on, albeit by my fingertips, but I promise the kids are clean and fed and I take my Old Navy sweatpants off every fourth day.  But since they’re skinny, they kind of give the allusion of a non-sweatpant so I figure I can get away with that and maybe I’ll even stretch it to every fifth or sixth if Steve’s so lucky.

I had what I told Steve was a “mental health day” last Sunday.  That included, wait for it, buying lipstick and a new bra.  I should’ve gone to the movies.  Or gotten a pedicure.  Why didn’t I get a pedicure?!  Though, honestly, a pedicure just feels terribly indulgent when my feet will be shoved back into their Wigwams for the next two months.  Each freshly painted toenail would probably have the imprint of the sock before I even left the parking lot.  A waste of money is what that is!

Nevertheless, we keep on keeping on.  The promise of spring around the corner.  How’s the saying go?  In like a lion, out like a lamb?  Let it be so.  And there’s still good things.  Like Steve and I watching House of Cards at night in bed together and being ever impressed and appalled at the ease of which Francis and Claire go in and out of various liaisons with people other than each other (we’re only a few episodes in).  And the music class that Parker and I go to on Fridays.  It’s really fun and he stays on my lap nearly the whole time, a mama’s boy that one is.  I watch his face light up with recognition of the songs we’ve been singing week after week and I just want to cover it with kisses.  How about the frequency at which the Hunts have been consuming quesadillas lately?  That can only be good.  We make them with any combination of things because, did you know, when anything has melted cheese added to it, it will be good?  Scientific.  Beans, veggies, meat, sweet potato.  I even attempted to give a little life to my breakfast by doing my eggs and sprinkling of cheddar in a quesadilla the other day.  We’ve living large here, people!  Oh and a new chapstick!

The last one was a joke.  End it if I ever really celebrate such mediocrity.  Please.

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